Gwyneth Paltrow

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American actor who shot to fame in the late 1990s in a succession of roles playing British. Would have been in Titanic if James Cameron had had his way, but that was one battle he didn't win.

Paltrow was married to Coldplay singer Chris Martin until the pair "consciously uncoupled." A phrase that in no way irritated Mark Kermode.

Paltrow runs a magazine called Goop. A title that in no way irritated Mark Kermode.

Paltrow was in Proof and was incapable of pronouncing the word "chemistry" correctly. Something that in no way irritated Mark Kermode.

Mark's impression of Paltrow in Iron Man is not to be confused with his of Renée Zellweger ("hamster staring at the sun") in anything. He insists they are completely different.